Many of you probably wonder what kind of riveting things happen in our everyday lives so we have decided to sporadically allow you a glimpse! Be excited. Whether it be a funny story or something so strange that happened we had to share it, you’re going to sit there and listen to it! Or else. This time, I will be talking about some funny and embarrassing things that have happened to me (again.) Part one here!
Guys in Suits
A couple of months ago when I was at my university’s main campus in the bowling alley/pool table area I was standing with one of my good friends watching a group of guys play pool. There was this guy I had a crush on playing pool a ways away and he just happened to be wearing a really tight suit.
There was no one else around so I, at regular speaking volume, was like “Man, I just love guys in suits.” My friend didn’t respond. Internally I was like what the heck does she not agree? does my friend not like guys in suits? I must encourage suit-liking. So more adamantly (and loudly) I said “Don’t you like guys in suits? The way a fine tailored one just hugs their body…” And I went on to explain, in detail I will spare you guys, the merits of suits on guys.
My friend still didn’t say anything and her face was totally blank so I kind of did a little huff and turned around to face the table area.
Turned around to face a group of middle-aged men having a business meeting at the table directly behind me. In suits. They were silent and looking at me.
That explained why my friend was so uncomfortable. I asked her why she didn’t stop me and she said she thought I knew they were behind me and that I was doing in on purpose because I was so loud.
Purse: Lethal Weapon
In high school I refused to wear a backpack because I hated how they looked (so practical) so instead I jammed all my textbooks and notebooks into huge fashion purses. In the cafeteria one time I forced my friend to walk past my crush’s lunch table with me, and he just happened to be sitting on the end. My fifty pound purse chose this moment to slip off my shoulder. I grabbed the strap and hauled it back onto my shoulder, but the bulk of the bag hit the back of his head so hard it actually forced his head down onto the table, causing a faceplant. The timing couldn’t have been worse even if I tried. I kept walking and pretended it never happened and he never said anything.
Screamed at Someone Trying to Flirt with Me
My A.P. United States history class in high school always had us doing random activities. One time we were split up into groups and each group made a floor to ceiling length poster to hang around the classroom (classy wallpaper). I got stuck taping our poster so I had to stand on a chair. I had just got my balance when, all of the sudden, I felt hands suddenly close around my hips. I’m super jumpy because of my anxiety to when I felt the hands I immediately screamed at the top of my lungs. The whole class stopped what they were doing and turned to look at us. The hands belonged to a guy always flirted with me and my friend, and he never really talked to me after that.
Dug Through Trash in Front of Class
Same class, different activity. This time the teacher had us doing something with watercolor (history class why) and I was like hey we need a safe way to collect water for these paints. I think all the cups were gone or something so I had the genius idea to actually dig through the trash to find a used bottle for water. My friend sort of stood there by the trash can awkwardly why I (too enthusiastically, probably) dug through the trash. I was so distracted I missed the fact the teacher was making an announcement at the front of the class and actually stopped because I was also at the front of the class, digging through the trash.
I also had to dig through two different trash cans on a different date, our house one and the city one, because I thought I had thrown my retainer away. It had been on my desk all along.
Fell into Teacher’s Upper Chest Area
In 8th grade there was this kid who had a borderline obsessive crush on me to the point where he even would bother my friends incessantly asking for my number. I would never give it to him and I ignored him so he apparently started to harbor a grudge for me. In English one day we were all standing in a circle doing some activity and I stepped forward to play my part and he put his foot out and tripped me. I fell forward into the nearest person, which happened to be my English teacher. My face smashed right into her… chest area.
- Cockroach vs Tarantula Standoff
- Stung by Bark Scorpion
- Saved a Beagle’s Life
- Teacher Asked Me Why I Hated Him
- Fifty Shades of Grey with Religious People